Assignment 4

Pathos Paragraph Revision.
Original paragraph:
In today’s musical climate of corporate control, the
question must be raised about some companies’ amount of
control. Has the conglomerate Clear Channel helped to shape
the sound of today’s pop music. As airtime on the radio
shrinks, the ability to create a good song under four
minutes is becoming a greater skill than ever. With the
number of new genres that are constantly becoming popular,
pop music is becoming harder to define. With so many tracks
battling for prime position, producers and artists need to
make songs that stand out. The real art in today’s pop
music is production. The first major aspect of creating a
great pop song is keeping your song short and getting your
ideas across quickly. The fact is, you don’t hear many
six-minute songs on the radio today. By creating a lack of a
wide range of songs, Clear Channel plays a large role in
defining what music is currently popular.

Revised paragraph with extra pathos:
In today’s musical climate of corporate control, the
question must be raised about some companies’ amount of
control. Clear Channel has helped to forever ruin the
structure of the pop song. Be forcing songs to be shorter
and shorter, it can become harder more creative ideas to
become popular. As airtime on the radio shrinks, the ability
to create a good song under four minutes is becoming a
greater skill than ever. With the number of new genres that
are constantly becoming popular, pop music is harder to
define than ever. With so many tracks battling for prime
position, producers and artists need to make songs that
stand out. Due to companies like Clear Channel, the art of
the pop song has switched from quality songwriting to
production. Producers nowadays have to know how to
communicate the ideas in their songs quickly. Time
constraints on songs have also made the listener not be able
to appreciate longer pieces of music. Often times when I
play a longer piece of music (regardless of genre) for a
friend, the main thing they say is “How long is it?” or
“Is it over yet?” Our ears have become so accustomed to
short, snappy pieces of music. It is now a challenge for
many people to even listen to a song over six minutes in
length. The fact is, you don’t hear many six-minute songs
on the radio today. By creating a lack of a wide range of
songs, Clear Channel plays a large role in defining what
music is currently popular.